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· FFCobra Fanatic
2,920 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I found this on the web while searching for Lucas wipers. Makes you wonder.

Lucas - Prince of Darkness

Lucas - Inventor of the first intermittent wiper.

The three position Lucas switch - Dim, Flicker and Off.

Or what about the other 3 settings: Smoke, Smoulder and Burn?

"The British drink warm beer because they have Lucas refrigerators."

"I have had a Lucas Pacemaker for years and never had any trou..."

How to make AIDS disappear? Give it a Lucas parts number.

Lucas systems actually use AC current; it just has a random frequency that's all.

It is not true that Lucas, in 1947, tried to get Parliament to repeal Ohm's law. They withdrew their efforts when they met too much resistance.

QA called and told the engineer they had trouble with his design shorting out so he made the wires longer.

Recently, Lucas won out over Bosch to supply the electrical for the new Volkswagens. So, now the cars from the Black Forest will come with electrics supplied by the Lord of Darkness -- how appropriate!

Alexander Graham Bell invented the Telephone.
Thomas Edison invented the Light Bulb.
Joseph Lucas invented the Short Circuit.

Recommended procedure before taking on repair of Lucas equipment:
Check the position of the stars, kill a chicken, and walk 3 time sunwise around your car chanting "Oh, mighty Prince protect your unworthy servant..."
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